make sure your partner knows where all the paperwork is

When a husband, wife, partner, or significant other dies, life changes completely. Here you can share your thoughts, feelings and reactions with others whose experiences may be similar to your own.
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lindana
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Posts: 40
Joined: July 2nd, 2013, 4:10 pm
Location: U.P. of MI
Loss: 09 Jun 2011
Loved Ones Name: Al, son
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make sure your partner knows where all the paperwork is

Postby lindana » December 7th, 2014, 6:39 pm

The paperwork.... I never imagined how much there would be. I was spoiled, I used to do all the bills before Dana and I got married, had to. At first we both did them, then, he was so good at taking care of me and everything else, I stopped. from time to time I would look into the bills and such, but.... never kept it up. Big mistake.
Some of you know the boat I am in, and thankfully Dana did a pretty good job of keeping records that I can find, but... please make sure you know what bills are due, when they are due, how they are paid- auto pay, check, credit card....
know where the insurance papers are. car titles, tax records. Make sure you order enough certified death certificates... some will take copies, but others will not. better to have too many than the cost to order more.
And a BIGGIE, make sure you have an advanced directive for health care- or whatever paper work it is in your area of the world and talk with your family about end of life choices.
For some it is a hard talk to have, but not talking about it does not stop it from happening. Thankfully Dana and I and Al had talked about these things often so we all knew what we wanted and had the paperwork to back it up. Some places will let you make the choices without the paperwork, but I know of a woman that had to leave her husband in the emergency room to go home to get the paperwork so they would DNR as he wished.
helpful hint, have a copy on file with your doctor and hospital, keep one at home handy, pray you never have to look at it again after it is all filled out. this includes all family members!
also, learn how to do everything, all the chores. car maintenance, yard work, snow plowing, all those things you just do not think of. reach out for help when needed, but learn how to do it for yourself if you can.
All the things we had planned on getting around to doing........ sometimes there is no tomorrow..... sometimes the circle of life does not work the way we all thought it would.

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Wendy
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Posts: 5
Joined: May 19th, 2014, 11:46 pm
Location: Silversprings, Maryland
Loss: 15 Aug 2011
Loved Ones Name: Robert
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Re: make sure your partner knows where all the paperwork is

Postby Wendy » December 8th, 2014, 10:25 pm

(((Linda)))


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